To Ashes

Pick up the pen and bleed.

These days, I'm not sure exactly what that means

I feel like I've bled it all away.

What was once good and bright now remains in ashes

The fire that kissed the sweet song of the soul grew too hot

I looked to you to stay within my arms. I saw your smile and felt that it was mine

Caught to unaware in the promise of your lips

You weren't burning to the same tune.

Scars will heal.

Breaks will mend

But burns... burns are the irremovable wound.

I never was an easy person, but then I never claimed to be

Bred of passion, born of fire, fed on intensity.

I will not waiver I will not falter. I will not take a knee.

Mock me, taunt me, hold me down for if any of you let me up, that mistake will be your last.

I will win

Hold it together. Control your anger, and promise pain.

Words to keep me strong, arms to keep me safe, fists to keep them warned.

When all the world is dust and ashes, the Phoenix then rises.

Maybe then the Lion is not the beast that rules his kingdom.

Perhaps the Lion has become the bird that will burn away the world.

Dust and missing pieces

There are days that I miss you that all end in Y.

Most of them are soft easy days where you only cross my mind a handful of times

Others are harder, where even the still of the breeze calls your name

Pockets of you left behind in my soul that I find hadn't been swept away

Would you be willing to take a walk with me?

Behind the places of my mind where the stars shine the brightest?

To the very reaches of burned bridges that have grown over with the vines and trees.

Skilfully navigating the trenches long built on a system so far gone that they forgot

That even at 5 and six a little girl needs answers.

Take a walk and skirt the ancient ruins of what it means to be beyond reasonably damaged.

Breathe not a whisper and maybe you can glimpse what few have ever dared;

Shining in the moonlight, cheeks sparkled with tears and dew drops of blood.. 

It's the iron hard will to survive on more than just scraps of empty promises

The begging bright light that only wanted reason but wouldn't die without it

This is me.. the me that misses you

The me that bleeds with the sharp edges to fragile flesh by callous words

the mes that loves without reservation or thought of consequence

The me that misses you more and more with every passing day.